This story originally appeared in the January 2026 issue of Premier.
In honor of Valentine’s Day, we asked some of the industry’s favorite couples—those who train together or balance a trainer/non-pro dynamic—what the secret is to building a successful partnership when love and livelihood share the same arena. From communication and trust to boundaries and balance, these couples open up about what it takes to build a strong relationship both in and out of the ring.
Austin and Alexis Gooding – We’re very lucky that we’re not the only ones involved in our business. Garth and Sonnesa work alongside Austin and help me (Alexis) quite a bit, which takes a lot of pressure off. Interestingly, the horses I usually get along best with are often the ones Garth rides, so it’s not always just Austin and me working side by side—and that balance has been a good thing for all of us. It’s taken nearly a decade of being together for me (Austin) to find the right rhythm between being both a trainer and a “horse show husband.” It’s not always perfect but getting to share this life and build something together makes it incredibly rewarding. A huge help for both of us has been the support of some truly amazing outside trainers and friends, including Gil Galyean, Robin Frid, and Kelly McDowall. Their guidance has made a meaningful difference for both of us and our program. In a trainer-non-pro relationship, it’s important to remember that the marriage comes first. While this is our livelihood, it still needs to be enjoyable—and let’s be honest, feedback almost always sounds better coming from someone other than your spouse!
Photo © Premier Sires
Photo © Premier Sires
Wade and Laura Spell – When mixing personal and professional lives, the grey area can easily become clouded. The secret to maintaining a successful work-life balance isn’t just one thing. It really starts with finding your best friend, because when you live and work together, you’re around this person almost 24/7, and stress and lack of space can quickly get to you. You’re both striving for the same goal, and constant fighting or arguing in a relationship or business environment simply doesn’t work. We try to use a lot of humor to manage stress and lighten the mood. We also keep things in perspective—it’s a horse show, and we have a separate life at home. You always need to put your spouse first, ahead of everything else, to stay grounded in what’s truly important. You have to ride the wave together through the good and the bad, the up and the downs. It’s not all glamorous or filled with wins. We also try to set aside time just for each other. Just because you’re around one another every day doesn’t mean you don’t need a date night. The main thing we’ve learned is the importance of finding someone with goals like yours—someone who is just as addicted to your dream as you are. Then, you can truly enjoy the process together. Of course, if Wade were answering this on his own, he’d tell you it’s simple: do everything the wife wants! If the wife is happy, everyone is happy.
Kenny and Ashley Lakins –We truly love riding together. We enjoy being each other’s ground person, and we’re very honest about what we think of each other’s horses. We both want to succeed at a high level, so we believe in being brutally honest. When we first started dating, that honesty was sometimes hard to hear, but over the years we’ve realized we’re both just trying to make each other—and our horses—better. We work together all day, get along really well, and genuinely enjoy each other’s company.
Photo © Premier Sires
Photo © Premier Sires
Clay and Lexie Arrington – For us, the key to a successful trainer/non-pro relationship is remembering that we’re always on the same team, working toward the same goals. We’ve learned that strong, honest communication is what keeps everything moving forward. When you respect each other’s roles, acknowledge both strengths and weaknesses, extend grace, and support one another through the ups and downs, the dynamic of sharing love and livelihood becomes a source of strength rather than strain. Just as important is never losing sight of how fortunate we are to share the same passion. Building a life and career around something we both love is something we don’t take for granted, and that perspective helps keep us grounded as we navigate challenges together.
Ricky and Jessica Noiseux – It is not exactly easy to run a business and be in a relationship with the same person—especially in an industry that can be all-consuming on so many levels. One of the most important things we’ve learned is the need to set boundaries between work and home. We make a conscious effort not to talk horses or business once we walk through the door. Sometimes it inevitable sneaks in, but overall, it’s essential to protect time that’s just for us as a couple—not for the business. We’ve also found that having aligned goals and business principles is critical. When you’re not working toward the same vision for the future, it can create unnecessary friction in both the business and the relationship. Finally, we’ve learned that any outside influence from the business that puts strain on the relationship has to be addressed. Whether it’s a horse, a client, or something in between, if it’s negatively affecting the relationship, a change needs to be made. Otherwise, that strain inevitably carries over into everything else.
Photo © Premier Sires
Photo © Premier Sires
Micah and Christina Hansen – Balancing a trainer/non-pro and husband-and-wife relationship is tough for most couples, but it’s even more challenging in our situation because we work together all day, every day. We own our facility and also board horses, which means caring for roughly 70 horses on our property. Micah focuses on training, while I manage the barn. Respect is essential. We make a conscious effort to respect one another and our individual roles in the barn every day. Communication is just as important. We’re very open and direct with each other, which helps prevent misunderstandings before they grow into bigger issues. One of the keys to our success has been recognizing each other’s strengths and building on them, while also learning not to overstep. A phrase we often use is “stay in your lane.” It’s not meant to be rude or dismissive, but rather a way to ensure we’re aligned and not giving mixed messages. Clearly defining our responsibilities helps everyone and takes pressure off each other. Lastly, we make it a priority to talk through any issues that arise. Being willing to work things out allows us to move forward without letting emotions get in the way, and that’s been critical to making both our marriage and our business work.
Jay and Kristy Starnes – We’ve found the key to a successful relationship while working together day in and day out is best summed up by a quote on the door above our office: “Don’t get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life.” We also recognize our individual strengths and weaknesses and strive to play to each other’s strengths.
